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“Don’t Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch”
Posted by Jennifer on January 24, 2012 | 5 Comments
This was the “helpful” “advice” that my interwebz friend, Diana, received on her Facebook page this morning. For those of you that don’t know, Diana is expecting her second child. She’s shared her news with her readers early on in her pregnancy this time around…she’s five weeks and a few days along. This morning someone felt the need to tell Diana she needs to cool her excitement about this pregnancy because who knows what’s going to happen. And you know why she should listen to this woman? Because this woman has had a miscarriage before.
I’ve debated back and forth several times during the past year and a half to even open up this topic to the blog but what this piece of “advice” has done to Diana really pisses me off and I’ll defend my friends to the bitter end.
Miscarriage blows. It sucks any fun and innocence right out the door when it happens. I know because I’ve been there. It’s a huge kick to the gut that leaves you grasping for air and answers. “Why me?” “What did I do wrong?” “Is this going to happen again?”
These are all questions that I asked over and over again to no one in particular. I wasn’t angry with God, I wasn’t angry with my doctors, I was just angry. And then I was jealous of all the women who seemingly got pregnant overnight. And then I woke up one day and realized all this anger and jealousy was eating up way too much of my time and energy. I’m sure it was much easier for me to make peace with what happened with my first pregnancy because it was just a onetime occurrence; I just happened to fall into the unlucky 20% statistic on my first go around. I can appreciate how someone who is suffering from infertility can hold on to that anger, jealous and grief.
With that said, I don’t think that gives anyone license to go around making another woman question her choice to celebrate her pregnancy from the get go. Diana chose to share her good news with her friends and readers early on and that’s completely up to her. I told Diana last week, before this comment was thoughtlessly typed out, that it didn’t matter whether she was five weeks pregnant or five months pregnant there was a tiny person growing inside of her and s/he deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated. Not telling people doesn’t diminish the likelihood of a miscarriage…if it’s going to happen this early on there’s very little, if anything, you can do to stop it. And if the worst should happened to Diana why should she have to grieve alone when she has hundreds and hundreds of people in real life and online who would gladly support her through her grief?
I don’t want to call for this woman to be burned at the stake or harassed. I’d like to think that the woman who offered up this comment to Diana wasn’t intending to be malicious rather she was trying to guard Diana against the pain of having to tell everyone if bad news were to arise. With all things pregnancy and parenting related though, opinions are best left unspoken unless solicited.
Week 3 of Getting Fit and Toned
Posted by Jennifer on January 23, 2012 | No Comments
I know this is super late but it’s been a busy weekend with Tim away at Ft. Dix for drill, a snowy/icy mess and a teething baby who is frustrated that she can’t crawl.
Week 3 of my plan to get fit and toned is behind me. I’ve still only managed to get in two nights of P90X but I’m okay with that because I’m feeling the effects the next day. Oh boy, am I feeling it! Surprisingly I’m still enjoying doing the workouts, it’s a nice way to unwind with Tim and I’m even motivated enough to do a workout by myself. I tackled the yoga workout on Wednesday afternoon after work. It was no joke! I had to skip through the last thirty minutes of the standing moves because I couldn’t keep up anymore. I’ve also learned I need to listen to my body when it says “I’ve had enough”. I paid for not listening with a sore bicep/tricep for the rest of night after yoga.
I’m still sleeping great and my hips are feeling much better; there’s less popping and no more cramping up since I started doing the exercises recommended by Christi. My energy level also seems to be increasing.
This week coming up I’m planning on cardio, abs and legs & back.
How is your work out plan going? What program are you following? Are you following a diet plan as well?
Disclaimer: Christi Williams and her website Christi Williams Fitness are paid advertisers on this blog. Christi developed a workout routine for me and provided samples of the protein shakes she sells on her site to me free of charge. All opinions are my own.
10 Commandants of an Army Wife
Posted by Jennifer on January 20, 2012 | 1 Comment
Today I’m guest posting for my friend Maria over at A Life to Bragg About. She’s an Army wife and a new momma. Besides showing off her cute as a button little boy, handsome husband and her incredibly fit self, she blogs about clean eating, her fitness goals and life in general.
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When Maria asked me to guest blog over here she said I could write about anything but said she was lacking some military themed posts. I racked my brain for days trying to come up with something that wasn’t overly preachy but still informative. I find that I’m often repeating the same things over and over again when women [Read more]
We’re Doing It
Posted by Jennifer on January 19, 2012 | 2 Comments
It’s been a long time coming, we’ve been thinking about it since November, but it’s happening now. Starting Monday, we’re sending Sophia to a sitter during the day.
We just came back from the sitter’s house to meet with her and have her meet Sophia. Things went really well. Sophia didn’t pull a card from the separation anxiety grab bag and warmed up very quickly to the woman, Liz, her son and her husband. We all talked for about an hour, not all kid related things either.
While we don’t live in that small of a town it really is a small town because I know Liz in passing through one of my best friends, they are cousins. I was referred to Liz through a mom I met in a mom’s group though and she came highly recommended. We exchanged stories about ourselves, where we worked, the usual small chat stuff. The more we talked though the more we realized our paths have crossed a lot. Both Liz and her husband recognize us from our time as tellers at the local bank branch (where Tim and I met) and I actually went to high school with their daughter.
All of this, coupled with Sophia’s reaction toward Liz and her family, Liz’s experience and knowledge made me feel confident that she was the one for us. I knew if I didn’t agree to a start date right there though that I would back out of it when we got home. This is going to be a good experience for Sophia. She’s going to get to socialize with another kid, go outside more and get more attention than I can give her while trying to juggle her, answering emails and phone calls.
I know all this in my mind but I still feel like a completely shitty mom for saying “I need help”. I know millions of other moms have to send their kids to daycare and I would have had to so as well much earlier if I didn’t have a great setup. I mean besides stay at home parents how many parents get to stay with their kid for the first six months and get paid to work? Not many.
It’s definitely going to take some getting used to on everyone’s part but I have a feeling it’s going to benefit us all. At least this is what has become my mantra. And if nothing else at least I’ll be in the privacy of my own home when I cry because I miss my baby.
Sweet and Spicy Glazed Wings
Posted by Jennifer on January 18, 2012 | No Comments
Every now and then I have an idea pop into my taste buds. Yep, you read that right taste buds, not mind. It’s weird. I’ll be trucking along and then all of the sudden I can taste something in my mouth that quickly turns into a craving. I told you it was weird. That’s exactly what happened the other day. I was working and then all of the sudden I wanted chicken wings and I wanted them to have a sweet and spicy flavor, something bordering on an Asian flavor. I made this recipe on the fly from things I had in my fridge and pantry. The prep and execution for this recipe is easy, you can definitely work this into your weeknight menu.
Ingredients
12 Chicken wings
Marinade:
1 cup honey
½ cup low sodium soy sauce
¼ red wine or apple cider vinegar
2 tbsp sesame oil
2 tbsp chili paste
1 tbsp ground ginger
6 cloves garlic, chopped
Juice of 2 limes
Glaze:
½ cup honey
¼ low sodium soy sauce
2 cloves garlic, minced
3 tbsp chili paste
1 tsp ground ginger
Juice of 1 lime
Directions
Using a sharp knife or kitchen shears, cut the tip of off the wing, discard; separate the remaining wing by cutting into the joint. (You’ll be left with two pieces, one resembling a mini drumstick.) Season the chicken pieces with salt and pepper.
In a gallon size freezer bag, combine the ingredients for the marinade. Add the chicken pieces, seal the bag, making sure no air is trapped inside, and toss the pieces in the marinade. Store in the refrigerator for at least an hour, best if overnight.
When ready to cook, heat oven to 400 F. Place chicken wings on a foil lined cookie sheet, skin side up. Bake in oven for 20 minutes.
While wings are cooking, combine ingredients for glaze in a small sauce pan and bring to a boil over high heat. Lower heat to medium and let sauce reduce, stirring constantly. (You’ll know the glaze is ready when it thickly coats the back of a spoon.)
Remove chicken wings from oven, cover with glaze and place back in the oven. Cook for another 5-10 minutes until golden brown. Remove from oven and let cool slightly before serving. Squeeze the juice of the lime oven wings just before serving.
Daddies Play Differently
Posted by Jennifer on January 15, 2012 | 1 Comment
I’ve read a few different articles that say daddies play with their kids differently than mommies. They’re more physical and imaginative than mommies. It’s true that Tim and I have different styles of play with Sophia. I tend to play with her toys the “right” way and sing a lot of nursery rhymes (and 80′s songs). Tim, on the other hand, has his own style of play. Below are two examples.
Week 2 of Getting Fit and Toned
Posted by Jennifer on January 14, 2012 | 2 Comments
I finished week 2 of my 4 week plan of P90X Christi Williams Fitness set up for me.
Clearly I’m not dead; quite surprisingly I’m enjoying it. Tim and I have been doing a workout after Sophia goes to bed for the night and it is kicking our asses which equals a great night’s sleep. This week we only were able to fit in two workouts but they both made me work hard.
We did the Ab Ripper on Monday night and I quickly found out that pregnancy did a number on my ab muscles and I am completely unable to do a sit up. My intention is to rectify this situation within the next few weeks. I also had a lot of cramping and discomfort in my hip region when I was doing some of the sit and twist exercises. I emailed Christi for some insight and she seems to think my hip flexor is weak, yet another post-pregnancy issue, and gave me some warm up, stretching and strengthening exercises to help treat the issue.
Wednesday night we did the Chest/Arms/Tricep workout. I was pretty impressed with my ability to keep up with the workout (for the most part); the one catch was I was doing “girl” pushups. “Girl” pushups or not I paid dearly for my efforts the next day. Sitting at a desk all day typing was torture, especially on the muscles between my shoulders and chest. We’ve been finishing up each workout with a protein shake…the chocolate Shakeology powders are awesome!
This week I want to do another Ab Ripper session along with the hip flexor exercises Christi recommended to me, a lower body workout and a full yoga session. I enjoy the yoga cool down exercises at the end of most sessions that I’m looking forward to a full night of yoga.
What have you been doing to stay fit? Are you finding a particularly area or exercise to be a challenge or troublesome?
Disclaimer: Christi Williams and her website Christi Williams Fitness are paid advertisers on this blog. Christi developed a workout routine for me and provided samples of the protein shakes she sells on her site to me free of charge. All opinions are my own.
I Feel This Big Right Now
Posted by Jennifer on January 11, 2012 | 5 Comments
It’s bound to happen to every parent. There will come a time, much sooner than you think, that your child will get hurt. Today was my day.
Don’t worry, Sophia is fine.
I had just put her down on the blanket on the floor in my home office after she woke up from her morning nap. There were toys littering this blanket and I tried to find one to entice her to play while I answered emails. I found this talking story book that she got for Christmas.
It does her two favorite things: makes repetitive noise and has parts that move, in this case the plastic pages.
I gave her the book and she went to work. I also went back to work and about a minute later heard the worst piercing shriek I’d ever heard out of her mouth. I quickly spun around in my chair to figure out if she was screaming for shits and giggles or if something was wrong. At first I couldn’t tell what was going on, the book was lying closed on her lap and she was crying. I leaned in for further inspection and found out what was causing all the commotion. Her little middle finger was pinched in between the heavy plastic pages. And we’re not talking just sandwiched between the pages either; she had caught it on the corner by the spine.
I quickly freed her finger and scooped her up to try and calm her down because at this point she was wailing and big fat tears were on her cheeks. My heart just sank. I felt so badly for her and let’s face it fucking sucks when you pinch your finger in a drawer or door. After a minute or two she was fine and as soon as a cat walked in the room she had totally forgotten why she was crying in the first place.
But in those few minutes I felt like the world’s worst parent for letting my daughter play with The Book of Death and Dismemberment. It took everything in me not to cry along with her.
Let’s Discuss Blue Ivy
Posted by Jennifer on January 9, 2012 | 7 Comments
So by now I’m sure you’ve heard that Jesus Christ has come back to judge the living and the dead Beyonce and Jay-Z are the proud parents of a baby girl, Blue Ivy. Oh really? You didn’t hear about it? Well you can read about it here, here and here. You can also read a report from the New York Post about the ridiculous circus that came to Lenox Hill Hospital the day Beyonce went into the hospital and the subsequent days afterwards.
While the New York Post isn’t the New York Times it does dig up some good celebrity gossip every now and then and I think there may be a good portion of truth behind their story.
Seems Beyonce and Jay-Z rented out a birthing suite at the rate of 1.3 million dollars (!), added some upgrades (like a bullet proof glass door) and had their private security with them as well. According to the New York Post report the room Beyonce was recovering in at one point was on the same floor as the NICU and NICU parents and families were being prevented from gaining access to the NICU ward because of Beyonce’s security. People are really up in arms about this; it’s been all over Facebook, Twitter and message boards I frequent during the day. People are calling Beyonce and Jay-Z selfish, spoiled and entitled. While those adjectives probably describe these people pretty well (why else would you get a 1.3 million dollar birthing suite?) I really can’t find too much fault with them.
You know who I do find fault with? Lenox Hill Hospital. If their administration would stop treating the hospital like it’s the Ritz Carlton and more like a medical treatment facility you wouldn’t have the problem of NICU parents not being able to see their extremely ill newborn children. This isn’t the first time Lenox Hill Hospital has made accommodations for celebrities either. The representative who commented to the New York Post stated they do allow reservations for their “special birthing suites” to be made in advance. I wonder if they get mints on the pillows as well.
A hospital is supposed to be one of the few places that you are treated as an equal and receive care based on your needs not the money you’re spending. Private corporation or not, doctors and these administrators have an ethical code of conduct to uphold and I think they’ve failed miserably in this case. People are calling for Beyonce and Jay-Z to pay the hospital bills of all the patients that were put out by this circus but I think if anyone is going to be throwing cash around it should be Lenox Hill. They should take the money for that 1.3 million dollar suite and pay the post insurance bills for everyone on that floor during Beyonce’s and her baby’s stay. They should also consider doing a little remodeling and put these “special birthing suites” away from the NICU. I’m sure two or three rentals of these suites can pay for a whole new “special birthing suite” wing.
Oh yeah, so we were supposed to discuss Blue Ivy. That’s Beyonce and Jay-Z new baby girl’s name. It’s completely stupid. Her initials spell out BIC (Carter is her last name thanks to dad Jay-Z). All I can think about are the pink plastic BIC razors my mom put in my Christmas stocking this year. Good luck with that kid.
Six Sanity Savers For the First Six Months
Posted by Jennifer on January 9, 2012 | No Comments
Today I’m guest blogging over at Singing Through the Rain. Kathryn is a fellow military wife and motherhood.
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People, I survived the first six months of having a baby. I think this qualifies me for my own television show a la Bear Grylls only my show would be (Wo)Man v. Child. I would be required to show people how I survived the first eight weeks getting up in the middle of the night, nursing through sore nipples and multiple cases of matisis. Bonus points if I do it with a British accent and I’m able to do my hair and makeup.
Even though I can safely label Sophia as an “easy baby” it still was a lot of work…[Read more]
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